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How many times have I said here, Life is full?

I mentioned a few posts ago that change was underfoot. It's big change.

BB has accepted an opportunity to relocate with his company. This involves a 1,000 mile move east.

Really big change.

I guess we've known for sure about this new direction for almost a month. The idea was put on the table before that, giving BB and me at least some time to process the possibility. For me, this meant some real grieving and feeling deeply how hard it will be to leave the support, connections, and relationships God's granted us here.

This place has been home for 9 years. It feels like we've lived more years than that!

We came to Texas with 3 young children. Now there are seven, and some are not so young anymore.

Our rapid family growth was a massive adjustment that led to a kind of breaking down to build us back up experience. Very difficult. A lot of dark days. And a lot of hope and change and healing and growth and growing pains. But don't forget fruit - so much of that.

There've been crises (babies who try to come at 28 weeks) and miracle joys (the adoption, births of three healthy babies, including Mr. Preterm, who made it to 35 weeks); and amazing memories of day trips and holidays, birthdays and small happy moments.

Contemplating this move before we made the final decision broke my heart. I knew we were insanely blessed with the most generous, gracious friends in our Texas life, but replaying the last 9 years in my mind highlighted the priceless beauty of these wonderful people. It was heartbreaking, of course, because I was imagining life without them around us, near me. And I wondered if I gave to them as wholeheartedly and lovingly as they've given to me and mine...and it inspired me to go into future days less and less me-centered, paying it forward.

My faith has grown, then grown cool, then struggled, and grown again. A bit of crisis there, as well, you could say. And that's been weird, and simultaneously very right. It's necessary to be honest and ask questions in your soul and of God and be real about where you stand with Jesus, even if it means admitting your faith is weak, small, gone, even?

I am excited to see what God has for us as individuals and as a family in our new city. It feels very much like the opening of a new season and that's invigorating to anticipate.

But navigating loss and change will be part of the transition into that new season, and we're praying for much grace in the process, for us and for the children, who also feel the upcoming upheaval keenly already.

Here's comfort in all that is and all that is coming:

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. 
Romans 8:38-39