Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Summer Memory Snapshots {tiny edit}

May the Name of God be praised forever and ever,
for wisdom and power belong to Him.
He changes the times and seasons;
He removes kings and establishes kings.
He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge 
to those who have understanding.
Daniel 2:20-21

Memory snapshots -

Summer 2009: me clinging to my cell phone, terrified I'll miss a call, strolling the park next to the girls' swim lessons, begging God to let us hear something, anything about AH. You see, before she was placed with my parents, there was an excruciating 11 days during which none of us were allowed any contact with her whatsoever. Day after day elapsed, each of us crying out to God for her safety and protection, and for news. In the end, we traveled Back Home, knowing God wanted us there, but still not knowing whether AH would be placed with my parents. A very tense, uncertain situation. A few days after arriving Back Home, God orchestrated the most unbelievable deliverance for her and on Father's Day weekend, she came to mom and dad's, and we were all together.

Summer 2010: a year gone by...I'm back at swim lessons, very great with child. Still waiting for a call, still glued to my cell, because by then, adoption had become an official possibility. And though AH was still safe with my parents, it had been a draining, dramatic, and sometimes devastating roller coaster of a year for everyone. So we lived each day, waiting for Baby to come and waiting to hear that AH would come, too. It was not to be - she would not be born into our family for many more months.

Summer 2011: School's out. I have six children. And while it's been a crazy intense nearly crushing life for a while now, I am entering this summer with a hopefulness and sigh of relief that has not been a part of this season for two years. And swim lessons start in about two weeks for five little girls I know.
Blessed be the Name of the Lord. Job 1:21

And, oh, the heavy grace God has sent in all of this crush and intensity! I can't wait to tell you what He did for us, sending someone to refresh us all...A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed. Proverbs 11:25

(Ann Voskamp posted this the other day and it was such a beautiful reminder of part of God's sovereign purpose in the crushing.)

912 hours outside with the children, in the sun

913 CA the fairy, fluttering in the evening light through the back yard, arms wings flapping

914 a dishwasher load of clean dishes, loaded by other hands

915 BB: wanna come out and watch me work? me: yes!

916 his excitement over a great project idea

917 AH, also a fairy, flitting along behind CA in the back yard, following the boss fairy's instructions...that is a healing scene, to be sure...a bit of childhood regained, a choosing to bless someone else, and receiving joy in return

918 a windowbox full of flowers...the thoughtfulness of the buyer, the sweetness of his making it a project for the kids, and for me...

919 a still moment with EG, both of us savoring Baby's sleepy face as she sat in her high chair after lunch

920 MK's absolute delight with her younger siblings' antics and personalities

921 the tiny, sweet smack-smack of Baby's hands - she's learned to clap her happiness

922 figuring out how to do better closeups with my camera!

1 comment:

  1. What you wrote about AH reclaiming part of a lost childhood by playing fairies with CA caused an epiphany for me... I really believe that God, in His perfect design and great mercy, has given you a family of stair-step little girls so that AH, you newest yet oldest, can beautifully reclaim her childhood through playing and interacting with her younger sisters. I imagine that some day one of them will say, "Remember how much fun we had playing fairies," and AH will remember. Or another will say, "Remember the little Bible story book mom read to us when we were babies," and AH will remember. She will remember because she lived those experiences through her younger sisters. Only God can give back such a sweet girlhood so beautifully. It brings tears to my eyes.